Chapter 141
When Ferris came back, the flowers with excessive pollen in the garden had already been cleaned up.
I had originally thought Ashley would come with him today, since this sea of flowers was clearly a gift he had carefully prepared.
But unexpectedly, only he returned alone.
“Have you eaten?” He saw me sitting alone in the living room, bent over the coffee table writing something.
I nodded, “Yes, I’ve eaten.”
He glanced toward the dining room, where the table was clean without a trace of having been used for dinner.
“I thought you wouldn’t come back today, so I didn’t order your meal,” I said.
In the past, regardless of whether he came back or not, I would always prepare his favorite dishes. Although most of the time he wouldn’t even touch them.
Later I gradually became disappointed, and to focus on my future, I started working frequently, leaving kitchen matters to Mary.
Now, I didn’t want to return to being that person who only revolved around the kitchen.
Ferris showed no emotion, only saying indifferently: “I’ve eaten too.”
I didn’t expose his lie. Today he had clearly come home early, yet hadn’t eaten a bite. He probably still thought I would prepare dinner for him as usual.
“That’s good then.” I went along with what he said.
After a moment, I said softly: “Cynthia has a cold, I need to accompany her to the hospital later.”
He nodded without questioning.
When I returned from the hospital, the living room lights were still on. Pushing the door open, I saw Ferris in the soft lighting, wearing home clothes and sitting on the sofa, flipping through a book.
Hearing footsteps, he didn’t look up, just continued turning pages, though his eyes weren’t really focused on the
paper.
I walked up to him step by step.
“I’m back,” I said softly. “I saw the flowers outside this morning, they’re very beautiful.”
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Chapter 141
Actually, I had already seen those flowers. Bringing them up now was just to say something nice, to give us both a way down the steps, perhaps making things easier for both of us.
Ferris closed the book and looked up at me, his handsome face glowing with a pale golden outline under the light. His voice was low: “Mm.”
There was a complexity in his eyes that I couldn’t describe, as if he was desperately suppressing something.
I could sense his emotions were off, but couldn’t guess at all where that heaviness came from.
“On the way back, I saw a nice Japanese restaurant and brought you a portion.” I placed the bag containing it on the coffee table.
I knew he didn’t usually eat late–night snacks, but I still wanted to try.
Sure enough, he pushed the food container away: “I don’t want to eat.”
His tone was flat, even carrying a few degrees of coldness. But I could feel that behind that tone was a mass of emotions suppressed to the extreme, like wet cotton stuffed in his heart.
I didn’t understand why he suddenly became like this.
“Alright then.” I said softly, “I’ll go wash up first, preparing to rest.”
I turned to go upstairs when suddenly my wrist was grabbed by him.
I froze, turned back, and looked at him with confusion.
He looked at me, unable to hide the pain in his eyes, speaking in a low voice, each word seeming to be squeezed out from his throat:
“Did we… have a child… who died before being born?”
In this moment, for the first time, I saw such clear pain on his face.
The heaviness in his eyes wasn’t blame or anger, but tearing grief.
I opened my mouth but couldn’t say a word.
At that time I was three months pregnant when I encountered an accident. Before I had time to tell him this news, the child had already left us.
I had wanted to tell him this news, but he was busy with work and we didn’t even have time to meet.
Seeing my silence, he suddenly stood up and pulled me into his arms.
His embrace was tight, as if wanting to bury all these years of suppressed pain into my body.
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Chapter 141
“Do you… hate me all along?”
He asked in a low voice, with a tremor in his voice.
I didn’t speak, but my eyes had somehow become wet.
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